Influences (or Why I Write the Way I Do)

Natalie Goldberg (free-flowing writing)
Clarissa Pinkola Estes (wild woman writing)
Jane Hutchison (direct-to-the-point writing)
Ernest Hemingway (simple words writing)

Friday, July 31, 2009

Kandungan

mahalaga pa ba
o balewala
ang kandungin ka
budburan ng halik
matamis at sabik
di makakaalis
sa higpit
ng yakap kong

para lang sayo
sapagkat sayo
lamang
alaala'y sariwa pa
isang mukha
sa nagdaan
nagpipiyesta
sa aking isipan
alaalang pagmamahal
na nais balikan
kunin sa nakaraan
at gawing ganap

pag ibig mo
pag ibig natin
di man tagumpay
ngunit buhay pa rin

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Coincidences

Among the people I wrote letters of reconciliation to last Saturday, one just celebrated her birthday while one just lost his mom. I totally forgot the first and totally shocked with the last. So there are indeed coincidences. Convergences of vibrations within the universe, letting in time and opportunity for healing and starting over.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

What Movies Do You Watch Over and Over Again? (2)


A film that explores whether women and men could indeed be friends, and as a retort, how such friendship, if successful, could be destroyed or not, by sex. Hmmm, the plot is ordinary but perhaps the natural and witty portrayal of Meg Ryan (Sally) and Billy Crystal (Harry) makes up for this. Perhaps friendship really explains a lot just as how someone as ravishing as Sally could fall for one as uneventful as Harry. Kidding aside, friendship really is a bedrock of a lasting and eternally interesting relationship with a man. Halfway through my relationship with Aldrin (the 6th) for instance, I went to thinking whether I could really endure it? We were not friends. Hardly any common ground (like he sees reading as too cerebral. hello?) Favorite movie moment: The diner scene where Meg displayed a 'fake' orgasm is much talked about. For me, it's the argument scene with their two bestfriends over a coffeetable that looks like a wheel. How Harry (venting pent-up emotions after seeing his ex-wife happy with another man) argued how pointless it is to own possessions as a couple as these would only be split up should they divorce. Love cuts deep indeed.


I like con movies, this the best among them. Who is Keyser Soze(played by Kevin Spacey and launched his career)? Who can forget Keyser Soze? A movie that weaves around a man and how he gets even with a band of crooks whose actions had consequences, consequences that derailed one of his. It's spooky in being reminded that despite Terminator's famous line, 'Fate is what you make'. It may not be so, really. That fate, taken within the larger context, is woven into the fates of others, for which we have no control and under which, we may be controlled, consciously, without an inkling of it. Death becomes the ultimate, irreversible consequence.


Another con movie but this time headlined by hollywood 'greats' sidney poitier, robert redford, david strathairn, dan akroyd, james earl jones, ben kingsley, and the ever-missed river phoenix. cons as i know it are lone wolves so getting a con done by a group is quite fascinating in the coordination, and absence of malevolent personal conflict. but this is a movie of course. similar to the ocean 11-12-13 series which could not just just convince me as credible, doable, by that many. favorite movie moment: Martin Bishop (Robert) lying his way after being 'discovered' snooping by the woman consorting with the Russian mathematician they were trailing. His posturing as a PI, giving 'love' advice and his dialogue on 'being a beacon' still makes me laugh until now.


Simple but immense in its message. Healing in humility. Henry Turner (Harrison Ford), a successful lawyer yet philandering husband and cold father rediscovers himself after a shooting incident maims his intellect and success, but opens up his sensitivity, his warmth, his heart. Makes you pause and rethink our isolation with our ambitions and even with just, our ego. We could be God by being just human. Favorite movie moment: When Henry visits the home of an ailing diabetes patient whose court case he orchestrated in defeating, with cunning. The now 'simple' Henry hands over a controversial deposition, claimed lost and non-existent, to the wife of the patient to help re-open the case to their advantage. The wife tells him, 'Mr. Henry, you've changed'. with the usual smirk characteristic of Harrison Ford, Henry smiles, tears welling, and says, "I guess."

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Bikol to English to Harry Potter

Translated two Bicol transcripts to English today. As I'm doing it, I could remember my Filipino teacher way back in college. That I was think 1990. To call one's self fluent, she said, on another language is to be able to translate in that language. I wonder what she'll say about my Bicol to English translation when my concern is to be truthful to the sayer as she or he meant it, and not just the words. That's the impact of micro-sociology for me folks. I'm more used to seeing social cues, as those embedded in pauses, the tilt in voices, and the frequency in which one uses 'ano' or 'kunyan' to mean little knowledge of the subject. I could note tiredness to signal my interview should end in 5 minutes. Repetitiveness, on the other hand, is not insignificant as this could mean frustration and agitation with the status quo. Hay. But I'm a little tired after sleeping at 3am today and happy to just rebel a bit and read Harry Potter all night.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Vitti's Uggs


these are my uggs. it is not clear (from wikipedia) why ugg boots are so named, also going by the names of 'ugh', 'ug' and even 'ugly' boots. i would dispute the last though because far from hideous, these boots are delightful to look at --- fluffy and lumpy sa feeling. Similar boots though named 'fug' boots have been displayed at a Canadian museum, worn would you believe? by aviators in world war 1! indeed, these boots are unique in their thermostatic effect. the outside is made of sheepskin and the insides of wool that one can wear the boots without socks and not feet cold at all. the naked skin touching the wool helps in regulating body temperature. only in the 2000s did ugg boots become fashionable, spurred no less by stars in hollywood headlined by leonardo di caprio.


this pair of mine was a gift from uncle rollie here in sydney last july 5. it has rhinestones since the only style that could fit my size 6 feet is in the children's section! fancy huh? it's a pair i've worn everyday since arriving to australia's winter nearly three weeks ago. it is such comfort to wear that i found myself asleep in it in bed. that's why i wear this pair only inside the flat to keep it at least exposed only to house dust. not that it reminds me that i haven't changed my quilt for the same past 3 weeks (it's winter anyway)! just this afternoon, i chanced a pair of uggs slippers at kmart. hmmm, i might buy those. they're purple.

(Information from Wikipedia.com)

Sunday, July 26, 2009

Release

i was watching this video prepared by yaman's school in quezon city and posted in youtube (search: FOOTSTEPS NURSERY). as i was looking at the pictures of yaman and all her classmates in nursery, i realized just how happy and pure children are. and how as adults, we wished to be as happy and pure as we were then, when we were children. then i realized how sad i have become for so many years, for so many times, and for so many reasons. i realized i felt sad because i carried the pain. i bore the hate inside. so in a sudden burst of inspiration, a thought burst through, THAT I DON'T WANT TO HATE ANYMORE. so i wrote letters to people i have crossed 'swords' with in the past. sinubaybayan nyo ito nun and you never left my side. that's why i'm sharing this and i'm letting you know of what i did. pwede kayong mag agree o hindi, it's ok. it's your right. pero ang sarap pala ng feeling just to let go. i suddenly felt light. i suddenly felt as happy as yaman and the smiling children in the video. parang bata uli. isang masayang masayang bata.

Saturday, July 25, 2009

What Movies Do You Watch Over and Over Again? (1)

EXCEPT for beauty and the beast, little mermaid, kung fu panda and barbie's nutcracker that i've watched with YAMAN over a thousand times (maloka-loka ako sa barbie, ayoko syang makita sa buong 2009!), here are the movies i watch over and over again (oo, may pinagmanahan ang anak ko):


Alex and Kate, together in time. Waiting could indeed be a virtue and spell the difference between having what you want and just having what is there for the taking. Keanu is staid but is still gorgeous and has great chemistry with Sandra Bullock, as ever (remember Speed?). I like the scene when they toured Chicago 'together'. Kate's smile after seeing Alex's graffiti never fails to tug my heart. I was wondering, what would have happened if I've asked Ricky to wait for me?


Janeane Garofalo is one heroine any one could relate to. Looks ordinary but smart and with a pair of intelligent probing eyes. Rural Ireland is presented here as warm, hospitable and ridiculously laidback, you'll think the setting is an imported version of Caramoan, with its sea and wind. Reminds that love needs no looking out for. It will find you. Favorite movie moment: When Marcy (Janeane) opens the video recording of the matchmaker (Dermot played by Milo O'Shea up there) and her heartwarming message to her, before he died.


Who would not like this film? Not only do we have the right to dream. We also have the obligation to fulfill them. Lest we go round in circles, looking back and regretting. Made when Kevin Costner still has no star complex and has not yet been cursed in being the poster boy of bomb-out films. Ray Liotta's eyes (as Shoeless Joe Jackson) are penetrating, even while saying a simple line 'hey rookie! you were good'. I like Burt Lancaster's role as the doctor who 'went back' to play, wink, and win at bat with a veteran baseball player, and how he gave up staying in the field to save Ray's (Kevin) daughter. Favorite movie moment: When Archie (the young Burt played by Frank Whaley) stepped outside the field to save Ray's daughter from choking. He could no longer go back. He has to let go. So, despite how persistent we are, there is a time when we have to let go of one dream to fulfill a new one. Or to just go on accepting what is and what cannot be.


I bought this in 2000 because of the wham! combination of dustin hoffman (carl bernstein) and robert redford (bob woodward). 'WOODSTEIN!', as called to (in anger) by the chief editor of the Washington Post. not only does it keep you glued to the screen but what makes it interesting are the strategies used by them to flesh out information and thus, the story of watergate. intimidation (office mistress), subterfuge (with Deep Throat) and dogged stubbornness (woman staffer at Watergate). Favorite movie moment: Bernstein's (Dustin) interview with Debbie Sloan (Jane Alexander) and his report to Woodward thereafter on how he had to keep on going to the bathroom to jot down his notes in tissue paper. hilarious but shows you the 'improvisations' done by journalists (and researchers like moi) on the field to get our stories as accurate as possible.

(Pictures all courtesy of Wikipedia.Com)

Friday, July 24, 2009

Where Do You Want to Go?

It's just three for me:

1. Greece. Since I studied World History in highschool, I've longed to see and have a picture of me hugging one column sa Parthenon.

2. Tanzania. I would love to see my good old friend Consulatha.

3. Miami. Parang it's too vibrant and carefree. I'd love to see the beaches and that interesting sea of bodies.

Other than that, I won't mind jetting between Phil and Australia in the coming years. By the way, while I'm here, I'll be visiting my Aunt Elvie in New Zealand and watch the Aussie Open next year in Melbourne. For someone living on scholarship money, it's good na naglipana na budget airlines ngayon. Amen.

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Who's Your Favorite Actor and What It Says About You

recently i was told that my taste in men is reflected on the actors (philippine and international) i admire. could this be true? let's see,here's a rundown of actors making me weak in the knees (and umph elsewhere), in order of admiration:

1. robert pattinson (sans twilight, he's a talented actor, singer, and musician)
2. ed harris (the rock et al.)
3. keanu reeves (the lake house)
4. zoren legaspi (yung asawa ni carmina na tall, dark, and handsome)
5. sean connery (as hot a stud 50+ years ago)
6. harrison ford (another senior citizen)
7. marky cielo (patay na patay ako dito. sya naman, literally!)
8. gary dourdan (warrick of csi)

ibig sabihin nito, i like men who are younger, older, moreno, puti, maitim, matangkad, may dating, buhay, patay, mahilig sa action, mahilig sa romance, usisero, sundalo, architect, ex-convict, tennis coach, dancer, at bampira! suma tutal, wala, the above list is not at all conclusive. pinagod ko lang kayo (at ang sarili ko). bwahahahaha (ugh!).

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

What Are Your 10 Happy Simple Surprises?

as i finished chatting with yaman and family, i stood up and found my cup filled with 1/8 of coffee. ay, ang sarap naman. i'm so grateful. so when i was brushing, i got to thinking those random occurrences that perks us up in a special way, nakakagian lang ng buhay ba. here are my other nine. what's yours?

...finding an im-per-dib-le pinned on any of my blouses when i need it
...misplaced 100 or 500 tucked between receipts
...wearing closed shoes on a suddenly rainy day
...finding myself alone and none waiting in line at a lotto station
...eating left over cold champorado in the ref
...a text, call or webchat with a long forgotten friend
...getting a taxi in a crowded street
...finding one last pair of washed socks for winter
...a surprise kiss and hug from behind

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Ordered Chaos II


oh, so i forgot to show you the rest of the table?

ok, the left is my personal nook, adorned by precious Yaman and a mini-picture of her with moi. The moleskine is there for my notes, personal and research-related. I do thank Maryanne (Moll) for getting me hooked on moleskines. Very handy, and smooth to write on...the dirty white pages giving you that old nostalgic feel that you're Hemingway. lately, my moleskine's been filling up with notes on passwords and bus stop numbers as i keep on forgetting...even user ids are slipping from my mind na. see that blue box? that contains bric-a-bracs like extra buttons, pins and prepaid cards. yaman, the avid box and bag collector, likes it so much (calls it her 'cabinet'), so soon i have to send it through a balikbayan or austpost box. so i'm still up with the laptop. in a few minutes, i'll wash the dishes, clear up the table, fold the computer back in place, brush, and lie under the quilt. in a world of white, i am so blue.

Ordered Chaos


funny how one picture could depict my life at the moment. so, just like my table, i am in ordered chaos. food of course is always present. but i've gone to eating smarter to lose weight (bye, herbalife?). so in the evenings since i got here in perth, i eat fruits. sometimes alone or with yoghurt. like tonight, i had yogurt with bananas (yuck! bad combination, both sour!) and almonds/sultanas/pepitas (yummy because of the mix of sour, sweet, tangy and rocky --- the right term?). the cellphone, especially the roaming E63 is always beside me to be in-check with happenings in naga and with my friends. there's the microwaveable rice cooker (i know how to cook rice na! takes 10 minutes only). in the background looms books for reading (not even half of it), materials i got from COPE (an ngo on the urban poor), the naga city government and personal favorites written by nat(alie) goldberg, clarissa pinkola estes, and wolfgang sachs. i decided to relearn economics and statistics which are powerful tools in research (although still on my to-do lists is to scour other research methodologies at the murdoch lib). for my research, i have made initial notes on a white board which is proving to be helping me in getting focused on my work. then there's amartya sen, who i think is one of the most innovative and freeing philosopher-economists of our time. his book, 'development as freedom' is the purple book on top of the first stack from your left. tacked to the cork wall (impressive!) are reminders from the village like rental schedules, the village map and how not to set the fire alarm in my room. i'm not yet content in staying here in the village so this may in a couple of weeks belong to memory.

it is just that when i get to back to my flat, after a day of writing and translating bicol transcripts to english, there is this voice yelling me to stop reading and thinking about my research. it begs me to just stop and just surf and blog and chat with yaman, my mom, yumi, ira and the rest of the family in naga. although i would counter by dredging feelings of 'guilt' (that no, you should read this and that, and set a deadline); rarely does guilt succeed. perhaps i ought to follow this voice to keep me from getting too unhappy and to keep me sane. to keep order in chaos.

Monday, July 20, 2009

What is your Secret Ingredient?

pepper
to perk up appetite
spice
to be unforgettable
basil
to sooth and warm the juices
lemon
for a tinge of intrigue
honey
for interest to hold
wine
for the release of memory

love is the food
we partake in
time and time again
variety works
but the taste
of only one
remains

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Scattered

bags strewn all over the bed. the green bag within a blue one, to avert further use of plastic bags. cross stitch set. a brown heartstrings bag, coasters, a pink butterfly box with magenda lid, a woolen parka and red sewing box from ate babot. i've forgotten entirely about them and hooked straight up to the net to catch emails and then blog. so what's my inspiration today or (de) inspiration sometimes. then i look back on the bed and see things that have to be arranged, on a sunday night. monday will be a holiday to give way to washing and cleaning, come inspection day on tuesday. so the newcomer is still scattered all about; her wits, her things, and her inspirations (desperations) taking time to settle.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

Sheath

Can i go back
Live back
Love back
Take it back
Whole
Start anew
Intact
Give it back
Whole

Friday, July 17, 2009

Death of S.C.U.M.

bad seeds
must die
to avert
rot
contagion
disease
suffering
alienation

evil
deserves
slow
painful
harsh
death

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Wishing

may crush ako. pogi, matalino at, pilipino. both us love books too. hay, siya yung tipo ng crush who made me wish i was virgin again. and young and fresh and still innocent. nung kamukha ko pa si leah salonga o si manilyn reynes na cute na cute. noong knockout pa ang legs ko. then when i was prepared and willing to be the other half of a man. kasi parang, sa tipo nya, kaya ka nyang alagaan, ilagay sa pedestal. so parang gusto mo rin, deserving ka. na alagaan, na ilagay sa pedestal. habang sinusulat ko to, may bumulong (si vice-demon), 'and you have to be all this to be loved by him?'.and i said, yes. gusto ko eh. i would have wanted to turn back the clock, for him. hay, sana noon pa kita nakilala. sana, sa diliman nako nag-aral. baka nagkita pa tayo sa AS, sa palma hall or kahit sa oval. baka magkapareho pa tayo ng course o naging magkaklase man lang, kahit sa PE. minsan, i ask, totoo nga bang there is a partner soul for me out there? nag-cross na kaya ang landas namin? or pinaglayo ba kami ng panahon tulad ni alex and kate? the more i see you everyday, the more i imagine. what if? what if? what if? masarap pala. true, imagination is a refuge and sometimes, wishful thinking works. sa pangarap, i am loved by a real loving man.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Finally!

Rina in room is japanese. she likes to cook, knows her ingredients by heart, loves vegetables and has recently spent her break volunteering for an organic farm in NSW. Karol is Kenyan is doing a masters in IT and specializes in cooking Ungari. Troy is Australian, enrolled in Counter-terrorism but aiming to shift to Forensic Science. He grew up in a farm and wakes up at 430-5am everyday.

If not for Rina who complained about her lost ingredients and Troy who had to explain that he threw them out past their expiry date, we wouldn't go out of our rooms. So, now, duties have been sorted out; cupboards have been allocated and one knows which is for whom and who can use what. We're even having sushi dinner together this coming Tuesday courtesy of Rina.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Sisters and Brothers

like hands
we root from only one
but are not alike
one points too hard
the other thumbs down
the fourth is committed
the fifth too small to make a stand
while the middle just f@c#ks up
to stand apart
seems to be the norm
but clenched
in a show of force
they are better together
the irony of unity
is independence still

I dedicate this to Yumi and Jungee. We all are at a crossroads.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Comfort

fresh from throwing all my frustrations to bestfriend angeline who patiently listened on the other line, i did my laundry in Building A of our unit, which is about two levels up from my flat (145). just past the pool and over a walkway of wood pillars. lugging the basket, i passed by a flat with partying inside, rowdy voices and smoke streaming through the air. learning how to use a laundromat is pretty technical but it would show how well one understands instructions. ok, so press cycle type here, put detergent here, insert coins, the clothes inside and doors locked, press start. so it would take 25 minutes of waiting. back to my flat. as i passed partying in flat 148, i suddenly felt a surge of relief that i'm going back to an empty silent flat with no lights on but humans locked up in their own nooks. suddenly i realized i'm glad that i'm not living with party animals. glad that these humans with me are silent serious types minding their own business and respecting my own. glad that even if i am withheld the joy of talk, i am given the privilege of privacy. so there is good in this at all. i am still in good stead, after all.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Price of Loneliness

to be or not to be
is not the question
when you do not have
a choice

Saturday, July 11, 2009

The Lonely Muse

three days to my stay in MUV, i want to move out. read my contract this morning and felt sullen because should i, i need to pay the remaining rent for my room until the termination date on november. that is such a loooooong time. so why do i feel lonely?

i live in a 5-bed flat, with a kenyan girl named caroline, a caucasian named troy, someone named rina who lives in No. 5 room in front but i haven't seen for days and also one indian staying at room 3 beside the front hallway. we must be all postgrads by the way we hole up in our rooms and only go out to take a small bite in the kitchen or just have a walk outside. to have a little company, i ate breakfast this morning in our small lounge room which faces south street. a breakfast of SUSTAIN cereals (my favorite), one apple, and one mandarin (which i threw out for tasting pale). still no housemate. for three days also, i've noticed that i'm the only one who used the bathroom. good that janty is picking me up at the train station later this afternoon otherwise i'll spend the afternoons taking walks, again.

i miss company, even of the tv. there's none here at our flat because it's discouraged. the only tv here in banksia court is in the rendezvous room beside the pool. i miss company. i miss my life there in green court (just at the other side of south street) where i could just sit at the dining table and out will come janty, kozue, and zaima. we'd have a laugh over coffee, rice cakes or kozue's vietnamese rolls (she's japanese by the way). i miss the sound of laughter, voices, talk. i miss humans.

i psyche myself into thinking that this might be a good thing. of going home to an empty flat and finding all space to yourself, within a 20m radius. then i could concentrate. then i could save. then i could just hook up and talk to yaman. but it doesn't feel right at all. i found out now that it's easier to talk about anger than about loneliness. loneliness feeds into nothing but more and more of it.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Technology Yes! 2

today, i was video conferencing with mading joey and mam lynn while on cam with yaman in naga. except for occasional glitches with the connection, i was able to see my daughter and tour her around my room and new things i've bought to ease my life here, just a teeny bit: a shopping trolley, flat iron, rice cooker; not to forget the sleeper shoes uncle rolly bought me in sydney. it's not easy, life here at the village. my fellow dormmates are graduate students and they keep to themselves, just as i do. in two days, i would be fortunate to see 1 of the 4 to ber here in the couch. so technology technology technology, we can't really be wrong with you.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

star tech communications ranks as one of the worst isps here in perth. For the past hour, all i did was log in to try accessing their website, for yumi. Truly disappointing as i am supposed to be in the powerhouse of australasia but instead, am in a place where log ons take forever.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Technology Yes!

Thanks Techie! i was able to speak and see yaman today. hay, good for technology. it only takes a little tweak here and a little click. salamat po, whoever invented the internet, yahoo messenger and made video chats possible.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Eating Italian

a few days more in sydney and i will become italian. italian as in peronis and risotto and penne. it's my aunt nina's birthday today so the girls (joy, kathie and marie) treated us out to as usual a gastronomic feast of italian cuisine at peronis in parramatta. as usual, the conformist had eye fillet while the rest either had atlantic salmon and pork belly. for dessert, profitaleros was the fare while others had creme brule and hazelnut nougat. hay, green tea lang ang katapat nito.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Where I Am

it's 3-17
a beanie at noon
viet beef soup
at paramatta
to mask the gloom
at home with family
a refuge to impending
alone-ness
a working brain
for the next three years
a heart in exile
at that

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Back to Back

i decided to forego missing with gastronomic satisfaction. so here in sydney, i just had quiche baked with goat cheese, fried salmon, chicken pastel, kuskus and pecan pie. i had such a feast i am struggling against sleep to steer clear of pancreatitis. i miss yaman so much, i hope we meet in my dreams. love you so much, abalantung. i failed. not that much food could make me not think of you.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Feast To Go

i decided to forego tears for gastronomic satisfaction. so in cousin dimple's mandaluyong home, we're having crispy pata, sinigang na bangus, chicken adobo, and asparagus with tokwa for lunch. syempre dami rice. and before i forget, i had pandesal dunked in coffee this morning. hay, sarap talaga ng pagkaing pinoy. isa lang di ko nakain and that is tunsoy, or tinapang may kaliskis. so i'll see you when i see you until our next feast together!

Friday, July 3, 2009

We Should Let Cory Go

i believe that cory has done her part in mothering the Philippines. At a most crucial time in our history, a woman framed as a 'mere housewife' steered the country clear from anti-democracy, although it is far from a perfect rule, to only put in perspective the unrest unaddressed still in hacienda luisita. cory, through the years, has been an icon, a representation of comeback democracy in yellow. But i think she needs to be let go. Prayers, masses, and vigils should not be for her to stay but for her to be ensured safe passage to the other side. Tama na, wakasan na ang pagdedepende sa kanya. I think this resistance is churning into more negative energy, which is making it hard for her. Why help in prolonging her suffering? It is time to pass on the baton to more able members and yes, for us to follow and set the example, as cory did. Sa ganitong conteksto, mainam isigaw, 'ako mismo!', 'ako ang simula!'. Wag na si cory, maawa naman kayo. It's time to let her go.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Shoo-biz

like ning, i miss nora aunor so much. the one who need not vocalize or flare her nostrils to mimic crying emotions. our showbiz industry is riddled by mestizos and mestizas, freaks with fake boobs without any talent in acting. angel locsin, iya villana, marian rivera, diether ocampo, rhian ramos, richard gutierrez, and even that kim chiu blessed with nothing but a stereotypic dumbfounded look. even vilma santos is too OA for me while lorna tolentino is too beautiful to be credible.

in our industry, the likes of robert de niro, al pacino, dustin hoffman, sean penn, and even america ferrera will never prosper. with their ordinary faces, they will not be noticed at all and if they do, they will be given second fiddler roles in teeny bopper movies. would you know which of our stars should be the brightest? look at those in indie films, getting applauded and awarded internationally. these are the actors and actresses with the right to shine - coco martin, gina pareno, alessandra de rossi, mylene dizon; even robin padilla was 'tamed' and magnified as a serious actor in one indie film. but what do they get in the mainstream? mylene hovers in the background as a contravida in spaghetti strapless blouses while robin padilla gets to play a flat hero na nakakabato!

hay, the showbiz industry just reflects the state of our consciousness as a nation. we go for show and are impressed by externalities. and we wonder at the kind of leaders serving us? tingnan nyo na lang ang mga ini-idolo natin sa primetime. ganyan po tayo kababaw.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Ama Niamo (Our Father)

Ama niamo...Our Father
Na yaon ka sa langit...Who art in heaven
Sambahon ang...Holy be
Ngaran mo...Thy name
Mapasamuya...Thy Kingdom come
Ang kahadean mo
Kuyugon...Thy will be done
Ang buot mo
Digdi sa daga...On earth
Nin siring...As it is
Sa langit...In heaven
An samong kakanon...Give us this day our daily bread
Sa aru-aldaw
Itao mo samuya
Ngunyan
Asin patawarun mo...And forgive
Kami kan samong...Us our
Mga kasalan...Trespasses
Siri kan..Just as
Pagpatawad niamo...We forgive
Sa mga nagkasala...Those who trespassed
Samuya...Against us
Hare kami...And lead us not
di pabayae
Na madaog
Ning sugot...Into temptation
Alagad agawon mo kami...But deliver us
Sa maraot...From evil

I came to humming this just before blogging and thought I'd share it. This is one of the oldest versions of Our Father in Bikol version, and the most beautiful and melodic as far as my Dad is concerned. I agree with him.