Influences (or Why I Write the Way I Do)

Natalie Goldberg (free-flowing writing)
Clarissa Pinkola Estes (wild woman writing)
Jane Hutchison (direct-to-the-point writing)
Ernest Hemingway (simple words writing)

Thursday, January 22, 2015

One at a Time

there are so many things to do. a lot of Ps as in Phd, projects, and people. other ways, to do these things, temptingly present themselves. but as with Money Management, the basic remains, focus one at a time and stick to the original plan. often, the original plan always happens to be the most doable. unless circumstances change to merit last-minute adjustments. but it is on occasions like these that Flow comes in. let it all flow, ride it, just be aware of the crucial Ps and all other will gather in one stream. Focus. Flow. one and the same.

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Ready to Fore

i don't look at it as pressure. it's just part of what i do. part of work that i have learned to love wholly, the bumps, cracks, and loopholes, and even nasty surprises. just as i cherish the vision to the smallest of inroads and yes, miracles and unexpected right turns. there are continuing and expanding obligations to the team, which is first priority because they are my immediate stakeholders. so yes, we are up to it. we are leading the way. we are trailblazers. we've known that long before the horns have been blowing.

Monday, January 19, 2015

The Language of Shoes

Been waiting here outside the doctor's office for more than 20min now. The doctor is cloistered in a room with a glass wall, shielded by hazy glass starting 2m above the ground. I can only see shoes. There are more than two people with the doctor that I'm beginning to doubt this is not a consultation but an interview. There is no sign they're leaving soon. The woman's shoes are curled under the chair she's sitting on. She's not a patient. A man beside her with hiking loafers still carries the xray in his hand. Now another woman's shoes are visible, open, to show pedicured nails. An old woman's feet. She just switched places with the man and they're not leaving soon. How right I am. A long wait indeed. Good I took lunch before coming here.

Saturday, January 17, 2015

One Lazy Rainy Day

it's the kind of rainy day that makes going out a drag. it makes writing and other office work contemptuous as the bed looks on invitingly. everyone gets irritable, from the dogs outside to the daughter who cannot upload a web photo on Facebook. and i just hope we can have dinner early and retire. let the winds and rains pass on My Lord. forgive us for another day.

Friday, January 16, 2015

Unusually Sick, Ready to Rest

it's not just an ordinary cough. the pain in one's limbs cannot be ignored. one gets fussy, irritable. only a medical doctor's advice would suffice. so dragging my burly laptop to, i was at 'work' while waiting for the doctor's call past 11am. i do not like being this way. but i have to listen. and the body says rest, rest, rest. and to slowly get the groove out of the long Christmas break. so now i rest. work and the thesis finished in terms of commitments for the day. i rest at 655pm, just as Pope Francis reads the Concluding Prayer of the liturgical mass at SM-MOA.

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

All Up to the Universe

I have done my part
And perhaps I can say more
And grab the right attention
But if these are not enough
Then it is up for the Universe
To resolve
Beyond me, I surrender to the Universe

Sunday, January 11, 2015

One Morning at a Time

thesis on a sunday. but there's no rest day no longer.

in bed this morning, i wanted to stay glued. but the thought was --- what new thought will germinate today as i write? what new or better way of linking will materialise if i just work on the thesis, even for just thirty minutes?

and indeed, these questions were answered from 605am to 643am.

on some days, the questions will be left hanging especially when the writing is 'off'. but there is no good day in writing really, one cannot anticipate it. one just has to show up on one's writing desk, open the laptop and endure the white and black page in front of you.

this thesis will be finished. one morning at a time.

Friday, January 9, 2015


Fortnightly Friday dinners
Yoga classes to de-stress
Saving, investing, keeping
Monthly mercatos with the Team
More Morse, Colin Dexters
Life within a Life

Wednesday, January 7, 2015

The Steel Diamond

Fought so hard today against three dumb foreigners who should know better instructing me how to do my job in work that i know out of combined deskwork, research, fieldwork, design and hands-on implementation. I am not steel diamond for nothing.

Tuesday, January 6, 2015

Glasses On

Eyesight worse
First time
Had lunch
Glasses on

Monday, January 5, 2015

Pushing it Right

i had to push myself. it's a saturday, you have to 'rest', as in do nothing cerebral. but all i need was a push. silence that irrelevant voice. to just open the laptop, Microsoft Word, and pray, that the PC will not turn off abruptly, as it has been doing, sometimes more than once on start-up, during the holiday break.

and so i did. worked. while serving Yaman two slices of homemade pizza, eating corn while talking with mother and sister, occasionally checking phone messages and games, browsing, and paying phone bills online.

and so i was able to transition to how responsible the urban poor, as a 'sector' was on pushing a solid tenure agenda in the early 1990s here in naga. and now, i'm working on tripartism already. yes, all, because i pushed, on the right direction.

so keep on pushing the right things, the right thoughts, and the right mindset.

Sunday, January 4, 2015

The Gift of Naga

as i leave Naga for the bigger outside home that extends more than 600km to Ifugao, i am thankful for-

...priceless days and nights with my Abalantung
...visiting Dad at Sto. Nino
...hearing mass in all fave Churches: Basilica, Carmelite, and the Immaculate Concepcion
...visiting Pili
...touching base with CSSAC colleagues and lending emotional and moral support in the process
...numerous happy and noisy lunches and dinners with family
...eating Maki, gambasetti, taho, turon, baduya, pandesal from Universal, kinonot, siopao, asado mami, mazapan, buko and mango pies at Kopi Roti
...walking along Igualdad and mulling over a future research on the Naga City Public Market
...every day, because being embraced by Bicol, my home is a gift.

Saturday, January 3, 2015

66 Days

the magic of 66 days according to this finance blog i'm newly following. 

the heart and mind and soul is happy it soars way up high with plans made realistically possible, doable. 

every thing boils down to patience, discipline and the willingness to undergo pain and the wisdom of the process. 

you are free Vitti, financially free. 

Friday, January 2, 2015

A Shoe Story on a New Year

it's not supposed to disintegrate. it's hush puppies. but it did.

on my way to carmelite yesterday, i had to go back. because the sole on the right shoe gave away first. then a few seconds later, the left one's.  that's why walking in it felt strange. unstable. thin. that's how old shoes get. when they have been left unused for years. this one, over five years perhaps. since leaving the philippines for australia.

and this always happens to me. shoes and mostly sandals disentangle while i walk them. about twice, i have to walk home on my feet because they can no longer be worn. more than once, i have to buy on the spot. to save myself from embarrassment.

so there, another shoe story.

Thursday, January 1, 2015

Finish this Year

i know i should write more than two hours per day
that there should be an exclusive desk for writing
that the books, the notes, transcripts should occupy their own shelves
that there should be a view of trees outside a writing window

but there is no more hour left to squeeze on a tight day
i write on yaman's desk or the dining table at Forbeswood
the books, notes, transcripts live separate lives in naga and manila
the view outside is a row of windows in a metro-urban jungle

nevertheless, you will write
you will write, and labor, and write and finish
this year...