Influences (or Why I Write the Way I Do)

Natalie Goldberg (free-flowing writing)
Clarissa Pinkola Estes (wild woman writing)
Jane Hutchison (direct-to-the-point writing)
Ernest Hemingway (simple words writing)

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Experiment

so i am challenged
to not change, judge
exhaust my tolerance
to the maximum level
and so i respect the flow
and make sense of anger

Friday, February 5, 2016

Writing Illuminates

i am on my 7th year of doing the thesis, 5th year on the writing. lately, i have not been following structure. for 12 days, either i am to weak to wake up at 4am, or i slept too late, i had to recover sleep by not raising the alarm. i get to sleep on. and yes, every day, i feel guilty of not writing. because as i said before, every waking hour, whatever time i give to the thesis, i get a breakthrough.  on my 7th year, i am already working, and it is not simple work i do. other than the travels, my work is to think, to write, to plan, to design, to implement, and it can get too exhausting.  i am getting to my prime even. my knees are getting weak. and my thyroid acts up every time i lost sleep.

so now i adjust. i will try to sleep as early as i can. the latest at 9pm then wake up at 4am and work on the thesis for two hours, on a work day. when there is yoga, i will still wake up at 4am, to either do computer work for 30 minutes or even just read. in case, i have to work late on an important office thing, then i will recover sleep until 5 or 6am and work on the thesis on a minimum of 30 minutes to an hour.

and i will remember this: any amount of time spent on the thesis is a breakthrough. any amount of writing spent for your CSR 2.0 or your designs, your workshops, your plans, is a breakthrough. remember that.

Thursday, February 4, 2016

Tension

slinking between sadness
and yearning
that yearning to belong
to have someone waiting
for someone to care
wrapping you up in
so tight embraces
one who will not let go
in this abode
which is also refuge
i find peace
solitude
the kind of
aloneness
that i want
but still
the craving rises up
the air
and i am alone
yearning for someone
to share this space
and i know i struggle
i struggle in every beat
of this lonely heart
and i let it be
let the sadness envelope
and subdue me